Posted by Jed Lewison on Sat Sep 6, 2008 at 3:01 PM Pacific

Rudy Asks For (And Receives) A Twin Cities Motorcade

I still can't think of a better man to have defended "small-town values" from the onslaught of Democratic "cosmopolitan" elitism than Rudy Giuliani.

Here's the former New York City mayor's small-town values in action:

Reporters were barred from Giuliani's cigar party Monday night, despite a massive crowd that attended the $25,000-per-sponsor event. ... But it was Citizen Giuliani's motorcade that caught our eye: two black Town Cars and a black SUV double-parked in the bike lane on busy Hennepin Avenue downtown, fronted by a Hennepin County sheriff's car flashing red and blue lights. Sweet! (Normal VIPs have to, like, wait for their drivers to show up.)

How does a former elected official/presidential candidate score an official escort? He just called up and asked, according to our spies. (Why didn't we think of that?) Alas, the cars drove off, sans Rudy, before we could ask more questions.

Some quick stats: Rudy has 3 marriages, 2 children, and 0 children who talk with him. Oh, and he likes to wear drag. In retrospect, he was actually attacking himself on Wednesday night. What a prick.

Rudy Asks For (And Receives) A Twin Cities Motorcade

I still can't think of a better man to have defended "small-town values" from the onslaught of Democratic "cosmopolitan" elitism than Rudy Giuliani.

Here's the former New York City mayor's small-town values in action:

Reporters were barred from Giuliani's cigar party Monday night, despite a massive crowd that attended the $25,000-per-sponsor event. ... But it was Citizen Giuliani's motorcade that caught our eye: two black Town Cars and a black SUV double-parked in the bike lane on busy Hennepin Avenue downtown, fronted by a Hennepin County sheriff's car flashing red and blue lights. Sweet! (Normal VIPs have to, like, wait for their drivers to show up.)

How does a former elected official/presidential candidate score an official escort? He just called up and asked, according to our spies. (Why didn't we think of that?) Alas, the cars drove off, sans Rudy, before we could ask more questions.

Some quick stats: Rudy has 3 marriages, 2 children, and 0 children who talk with him. Oh, and he likes to wear drag. In retrospect, he was actually attacking himself on Wednesday night. What a prick.

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